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Preheat your oven to 375°F (190°C). Lightly grease a 9×13-inch baking dish and set it on the counter where you’ll be able to easily pour the sauce over the pasta.
Bring a large pot of salted water to a boil. Add the elbow macaroni and cook until just al dente, following the package directions but shaving off about 1 minute so the pasta doesn’t get mushy in the oven.
Drain the macaroni well and spread it evenly in the prepared baking dish. Give it a quick stir so it doesn’t clump together while you make the sauce.
In a medium saucepan, melt 3 tablespoons of butter over medium heat. Sprinkle in the 3 tablespoons of flour and whisk constantly for about 1 to 2 minutes, until the mixture is smooth and slightly foamy but not browned. This is your roux, which will help thicken the sauce.
Slowly pour in the warmed milk while whisking, making sure to break up any lumps. Keep whisking and cook over medium heat for 4 to 6 minutes, until the sauce thickens enough to coat the back of a spoon.
Whisk in the Dijon mustard, kosher salt, black pepper, and paprika. Taste and adjust seasoning if needed; remember the cheese will add more flavor, too.
Turn the heat to low and add the shredded cheddar and Gruyère, a handful at a time, whisking gently after each addition until melted and smooth. If using Parmesan for extra richness, stir it in now. You should have a silky, decadent cheese sauce.
Fold the chopped cooked lobster meat into the hot cheese sauce, stirring gently to distribute it evenly. This is your 1 decadent mixture—cheesy, creamy, and full of lobster pieces—ready to be poured over the macaroni.
With the baking dish of cooked elbow macaroni in front of you, carefully pour this lobster-cheese mixture evenly over the pasta, making sure to cover all the noodles. Use a spatula or spoon to gently nudge the sauce into the corners and down between the pasta so everything is coated but not overly stirred.
If you like a crunchy top, in a small bowl mix the 2 tablespoons of melted butter with the breadcrumbs until they look like damp sand. Sprinkle this mixture evenly over the top of the sauced macaroni.
Place the baking dish on the middle rack of the oven and bake for 20 to 25 minutes, or until the top is lightly golden and the edges are bubbling. If you want a deeper brown crust, you can broil for 1 to 2 additional minutes, watching closely so it doesn’t burn.
Remove the dish from the oven and let the lobster mac and cheese rest for about 5 to 10 minutes so it can set slightly and isn’t too runny when scooped. Sprinkle with chopped fresh parsley if using, then serve warm, scooping down through the crunchy top to get plenty of sauce and lobster in each serving.
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